money! rummaging down the back of sofa, looking neath piles of clobber un-dust-disturbed for centuries, midden-hoard gaurded by smaug! i have unearthed 42 of these leaden gold dullard shinys… at first i thought it was 23… anyway more than mere fingers and toes allow also many sea shells, hag stones and my first ever mobile phone… treasure galore! my policy with loose change is to heave it out of pockets into strewn heft heaps, presuming that with teenagers in the house, they will fillet the piles, for chunky coinage for bus fare useage these they missed!! 2 weeks left… what shall i do with them? how shall i squander? half on bauble-age, half on a good cause? i reck for some reason i am pondering bonkers newton, who not only spent longer writing mystical alchemical treatise than investigating gravity but in his later life as guardian of the Royal Mint became obsessed with catching coin clippers… those that parmesan grate toenail clippings metal melt down and recongeal! indeed
apropos of nothing… smelling salts of randomness.. t’other day i was up on the downs at telscombe with sherbailey, was regaling her with the tale of how my arm got smithereened in a bike crash there when she was a baby! see regurgitated very ancient email below… since then that elbow has been weirdly aching so i’ve just spent the last half hour ‘curing’ it by making a collage of me in the arms of barry gibb, all tickety boo now! ………………………………. ……………………………………..
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Always wear a bike helmet! having shattered my elbow, I’m more than relieved not to have fractured my skull, after the crash, the hapless helmet had a huge chunk of plastic gouged off the side and was split, nay sundered in two yuk ok so bike helmets make you look a little gormless, but through the power of self regarding I have always felt myself to resemble a chivalrous Knight, even more so when one one windy day, astride bike, I retrieved our dustbin lid from down the road. A beautiful sunny day when I set off on my adventure, the dilligent trundle up Whitehawk hill, then away across the freedom of the downs, huge gulps of fresh air, the yawn of view away to Lewes, Kingston higgledy piggledy sheltered beneath the escarpment. all was green and vibrant, ‘cepting the fields of rape, a million plants all shouting with one voice (‘what did they shout?’ why the yell of YELLOW!) hurtling down the downs, plodding up the ups. mucho barbed wire fences though, a smidgin steve mcqueen in the great escape Beckonned by bells, it was back on the road into Rodmell, the old stone church next to Virginnia Woolfs house parked on a bench, beneath the fuschia blossoms of a cherry tree, The genteel, the well heeled, the dowdy and the middle aged wandered to church, cows and gravestones, pastoral vibes up I jumped, on down the long hill to Telscoombe village, my head cheerfully singing ‘we’ve got a great big convoy, trucking on through the night’ back on a stoney track, then over the brow of the final hill, I started to accelerate, my hand got bounced away from the brake, by the time I got it back in position, I thought if I brake now I’ll fall off, so I thought I’ll try and ride it out, big mistake, the bike went faster and faster, a pell mell hurtle (when did life become a video game?) huge stone!!!! when I came round a sweet old couple were bending over me ‘you alright’, I thought they were my parents! next a four wheeled drive came swaggering down the hill from the turreted mansion on the hill. it pulled up, out hopped a rock star type, old, tight leather troosers, a stripey top, long hair, hat and sunglasses I was too dazed to know who the mystery millionaire was? but with no great fuss he slung me and my bike into the car and drove me home. when I got home I just started crying, shock!!! a thoroughly miserable experience still my fantasists mind will always summon the image of being wounded and swooned, being carried down the mountainside in the arms of Barry Gibb!
ha! wonderful! middle aged manatee encounters himself for the first time in the realm of virtual reality pics by marie, from her expresso martini, burrito and science birfday i think i was supposed to be solving a puzzle? but got distracted by dancing with myself, groovy entranced! being of a solipsistic disposition, i’ve always enjoyed boogie-ing with my own shadow the best tho, possibly, was dancing with z in the prague hall of mirrors, after sleeping on the hill, near the pong of Rose gardens, neath the eiffel tower mirror myriad me, zee …and bruce lee
‘destroy the image and you will break the enemy!’
May: This was my fav moment from yesterday.. well maybe after breaking into my own flat
Ha! Wave some plastic at the lock and do the tarantella! Easy when you’ve skillz xx
aw gotta love the weeds, stubborn, robust, flambouyant… life as wriggle preposterous and just about everywhere as it gets as a friend pointed out phone box must make an ideal teensy green house, plus you’d get watered by the occasional drunk the street furniture of yesteryear… explain to the yoof, phone boxes are from a time when we were mobile … and telephones not fumble for yet another 2p as the pips go… beep beep beep
