Category: epic posts

yesterday one of those ‘not in service’ ghost buses whizzed past me as i was waiting at the stop.
This ones number was ‘666’ destination Devils Dyke. scooby dooby doo!

…in further developments i read somewhere that Sussex Women are ‘sposed to have longer legs than them in other parts of the country.
apparently it’s on account of them having to haul themselves out of the claggy quicksquelch mud out up on the downs

Whilst the big church in Steyning was founded by St Cuthelme, who was on his way from Devon to Canterbury, he was pushing his aged and ailing mother in a wheelbarrow!
when he got to Steyning, apparently he had a visionary dream, so next morning the Jimmy Nail lookalike declared ‘i’m reet shagged ma. let’s build a church here’. fact!

A good friend of mine also told me that the logo of an Apple for Apple computers is in fact an homage to Alan Turing, legendary boffin, famous for the ‘Turing test’ and cracking the Enigma code
In a sad tale, Turing was caught cottaging, persecuted by the authorities, who insisted he have Testosterone injections. barbaric
he probably committed suicide, it is believed he killed himself with a cyanide laced apple
tragic and oddly reminiscent of Snow White
apple pips themselves are said to contain miniscule traces of cyanide

For Andy and Rohan
………….

When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;

And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.

kids parade tomorrow morn

LP: Do you know what time it starts and where from?

RB: err umm, i think it’s from about 10:30 / 11:00 ish wending it’s way from kinda far North Lanes St Bartholowmews way, down Sydney street, through the pav gardens ending up on the beach, Marine parade

prob best just to follow your ears!

.. follow yer wooly mammooth ears !

…err guns i mean
I enjoyed James border guard story the other day and tho’ not much liking violence at all, it is amazing how authority figures brandishing weapons focuses the attention.. any more tales?

….old email yak……..
……………
headed for my sisters down in Miami, we got as far as West Palm Beach (later of hanging chad, election 2000 fame), drove around for an hour looking for a suitable beach or layby, knackered, so tried to get some sleep in a shopping mall car park
Woken up half an hour later, Whazzat! the full sirens and loud hailer routine
‘GET OUT OF THE CAR. KEEP YOUR HANDS WHERE WE CAN SEE THEM. NO SUDDEN MOVES’
We were surrounded by police, pointing guns at us. scarey.
Pushed up against the bonnet of the car, arms and legs stretched, patted down, frisked, it was all very Starskey and Hutch, or Chips, which, i guess goes to show how long since i’ve watched any cop shows!
they were really nice to us once we did our ‘we’re just young british students having adventures in your lovely spiffing country’ routine
they let us kip there in the car park till 4:00 in the morning, then waved to us from the doughnut and coffee stand as we left

….hmmm if yer very bored, heres the first bit of the email
……………

we were doing a Driveaway from New York to Miami, you know where trusting folk allow you to deliver a car halfway across the States for them, I hopped in the car after not having driven for 7 years and tentatively drove it away. Thank heavens for Cruise Control!
it was a fantastic trip, we drove along the Appalachian Skyway in the Fall, blue grass and banjo music on the stereo, trapped amidst the psychedelic swirl of leaves. The most sumptuous reds, oranges, yellows. Like being in a huge Kaleidoscope or a snow shaker with leaves!
I did my laurel and hardy routine ‘In the blue ridge mountains of Virginia, on the trail of the lonesome pine’.
Goodnight John Boy!

Then in one small redneck town, just a southern baptist church and a McDonalds, some of the local teen girls were ‘Are you the lead singer from the Gin Blossoms’ (who they!), we had to leave rather sharpish when the ‘good ole boys’ started paying us too much very bored attention………..

impending weekend