Author: basgallop

impending weekend

do you know the very narrow lane, twitten, twixt the black lion and the cricketers?
apparently back in Stuart times when Charles was making his escape to France,
he was getting a piggy back along there, he didn’t wish to get muck on his winkle pickers, doublet and hose.
He met a rather portly Fish wife coming the other way, she was rather flustered and too wide to reverse, so they had to bowl her over and step over her as she lay on the ground.
With Royal manners like that, little wonder they chopped his dads ‘ead orf!

oh and later there was a famous race, where a tubby fella bet he could bet a renowned athlete he could beat him in a race, so long as he had a 10 yard headstart and could choose the course.
they raced along that alley and the athlete couldn’t get past him! genius

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tomatoes are brilliant, dead easy and the taste is umpteen times better than the shop rubbish

Jonny has an allotment, he’d know

holy smoke as seen on the Kent Police website

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East Dean!
I took the kids there last summer and it was brilliant, a hidden valley in the heart of the South Downs, surrounded by beech forest. Gerronimo Rope Swings

Extremely Cheap. No loos

New House Farm East Dean Chichester West Sussex

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Those pesky ponies in the New Forest tho’
when i was about 5 my family went for a picnic there we were attacked by them, my sister was kicked by a stallion
she still has a lucky horseshoe hoofprint mark on her leg (some sorta stigmata!)
my mum whisked me and my younger sister away to safety, whilst my dad somehow hoiked the back seat out of the car and fought the stallion off, by this time the horse was rearing up like billyo. Hi Ho Silver!
Kemo Sabe Tonto
Dads are SuperHeros
Somehow amidst the meleé and kerfuffle my 2 year old brother was completely overlooked and stayed cheerfully playing on the picnic rug.

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don’t bash the gnasher! He’s a hero!
I have a furry Gnasher badge with wobbly eyes amongst my desktop clutter collection of shells, marbles and feathers.
Actually he only has 1 eye as the other wobbled off.
It’s a proper members badge, which i ‘borrowed’ off Finn a year ago, he hasn’t noticed it’s missing

as well as Gnasher Dennis had a pet pig called… Rasher!

the bash st kids are the best tho’

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i have neglected to have my tuppeny haporth worth of opinion!

hmmm if he’s after an sas style macho ‘eagle eyes, fuzzy felt hair’ action man book i’d recommend ‘Into Thin Air’, by John Krakatoa.
it’s a real life story, by a bloke who was on the expedition, of people dying on Everest

Theres some poor project leader fellow, trapped just below the summit, on the radio, he gets patched through by the internet to have a last conversation with his wife
…gives me the goose bump heebee geebies
a story of hubris really, doesn’t matter how good a climber you are, if the mountain is going to get you, it will.

………..
this year tho’, i’ve been having a spate of reading books by Neil Jordan and recommending them to everybody!
‘Shade’ and ‘Sunrise with Seamonster’
he’s the irish film director who did ‘the company of wolves’ and ‘the crying game’
admittedly his characterisation is a bit patchy and plotwise the wheels come off the waggon, but i think he’s brilliant.
lyrical, written with great personal warmth and an exuberance of language, incredibly poetic
and he’s writing about places in Ireland i know quite well

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also

…… lauras uncles book sounds good too!
spare a thought for my scriptwriter brother, who lives in Salt Dean, he’s currently doing a Scott of the Antartic adaption, apparently Scotts last letters are ‘not inspiring’ at all, very little self awareness
Scott spends most of the time blaming people ‘we would have made it if we could have left the sick behind’.
The derr-brain doesn’t seem to consider that it was his fault they didn’t take any huskies! barking

My brov reckons they pretty much forced Captain Oates out into the snow ‘i’m going outside now, i may be sometime’.
The only other thing known of note about Oates is that before he left for antartica, he made a woman pregnant, she was 12… those Victorians, mind boggling.

Anyway my brother finds it tricky writing about Antartica in this heatwave.
I’ve suggested he sit in the bath surrounded by ice cubes, slurping a blueberry slush puppy, from there he can glimpse the white cliffs, if you squint they look like Iceberg glaciers!
and my nephew johnny is only 2, so he waddles about in convincing penguin fashion!