dull by lunch. Rod Stewart

somebody mentioned Rod Stewart the other day, i met his cousin at a wedding, years ago, she was quite a hoot, similar poodle blonde hair and healthy appetites

heres a very old email tale. hum drum, tum te tum umpteen times
went to a scottish hippy wedding yonks ago, all tartan and dreadlocks, sarongs and grannies and lots of wafty purple. pleasantly wild!

It was in Geoffs parents garden, out in North Berwick,
right on the edge of the Firth of Forth, just below North Berwick Law,
a traditionally bleak scottish hillside, this one though had the giant jaw bone of a whale on top of it.
The house was an odd rambling, bewildering place, the 3 kids (one was called Hamish!) had built it all themselves

A great day, giddy highland reels and jigs, dancing with all the grannies,
flinging myself about the dance floor, free reeling bob dylan, endlessly guzzling malt whisky

anyway ended the night, blearily, bundled off into a bedroom, with the best woman, Nickii, shelter some sleep under a huge scrummage pile of colourful south american jumpers.
half way through the night, mouthful of wool… fell off the couch… almost woke up… head spins … ‘bleagggh, where am i’
stumbled to the loo, but somehow blundered back the wrong way in the dark,ended up in a bedroom, was it ours?

i was like harshly hoarsely whispering ‘Nickii, Nickii, you there?’
then keeping dead still, i could hear breathing….two people breathing, ooops!
yikes, my thoughts turned to escape
rattled at the door handle, couldn’t get out, somehow had become locked in, trapped!
worse gradually, the breathing pattern had changed the sleepers were now awake….

finally they flicked on the light.
There sitting up in bed, bedecked in pink nighties and pyjamas…. were the brides parents.

‘aaah good evening.how are you?’ , found the lock, threw the door open and fled!

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