Author: basgallop

chips and mayonnaise?

…….
once when i was on a cross channel ferry back from Amsterdam,
a full moon, huge waves, i spent the whole voyage dashing exuberantly about the deck,
hurrah, hurrah for the King over the water,
at one point i was leaning over the side, pondering philosophically, gawping at the foaming wake.
At that moment an announcement came over the tannoy.
crackle hiss…. ‘DON’T DO IT. DON’T JUMP’ …splutter baffle
nearly made me leap right out of my skin. i looked up to see away in the turret a beaming big bearded cap’n Birdseye type,
giving me a thumbs up sign. ha. cheeky!

valentines day

from an old email, no harm in a cheery dose of valentines schmaltz!
… oh, first time i wrote a version of this tale, it was in very bad czech, for my friend Dita,
whilst out drinking, we’d communicate solely by drawing cartoons on beer mats
luckily, a lot of beer mats in prague

….
once when i was on the escalator, there was this oldish czech couple above me,
they were huge huddle bundled up in coats
he, with a red drinkers nose, protection ‘gainst the winter cold, she pale faced and chubby.
Suddenly he went down on one knee and started serenading her
a dreadful croak of a voice, but capable of holding a tune
she was delighted, laughed and laughed, her jowls jelly wobbling with glee.
this, in turn, set him off, hoot cackles bound resounding to the roof
they loved each other
the escalator hurtled down, down onwards towards the end
there a coke can, clank clatter, spieled and tumbriled in the gutter,
weir trapped at the base of the escalator…
…………………..

i do like my shrek like happy grotesques, valentines is great
the good thing about life is every person loves someone!

having lurked in the bathroom cabinet for a month or so, our pet hyacinth has bloomed miracously.
What a wonderful pong!
only a smellovision internet would do it justice

… actually what was that John Waters/ Divine film, where you got handed a scratch and sniff card as you entered the cinema?

… in response to:

Anyone know how to get cheap calls to overseas mobile numbers?

………..

Metaphor! I mean Semaphore! wow, the things people did before the internet
back to the future
near where i grew up there was disused Semaphore tower up on the ridge of the North Downs, a brill place to go and play. I think it’s a tall skinny house now. lots and lots and lots of stairs.

It must have been quite fun standing up there hurrah, hurl, waving a few flags about and looking down on the treetops below.

The tower was part of a chain that stretched all the way from Greenwich to Portsmouth, for sending messages rapidly to and from the fleet ‘Matty Taylor scores a scorcher’
I want to say the fantastic Samuel Pepys set it up, an everyman visionary, but i’m not remotely sure if thats true?

Inspector morse code

.. | .-.. — …- . | -.– — ..-

always the first words to learn in any new language!

a lo fi, but useful site

http://users.scoutnet.nl/~inter/morse/morseform.html